AND ONE MORE THING…

THANK GOD IT’S FUCKIN FRIDAY!!!!!!!

TGIFFFFFFF!!!!!!!! BROTHAS!

I only have time to say this.

If you think you’re safe on a mac, with “private browsing” on and you clear your cache while you surf your porn, YOU’RE WRONG.

YOU CAN SEARCH FOR PORN ON YOUR COMPUTER AND THE CACHE SHOWS UP!

As seen from Cheak’s computer (and mine too of course)

Cheers!
Ivan Yeow

Speech – Combination of Morpheus & MLK

Good Evening Ladies and Gentlemen.

I am happy to join you today in what will go down in history as the greatest demonstration for freedom in the history of our nation, in Hong Lim Park. Since this is the 2nd ever demonstration since the 60s.

In my company there is problem. And the problem is the lack of equality. We gather here as interns from all over the country from all walks of life. Some of us here have been tasked to paint the wall in the company, some have been asked to photocopy and print endless copies of documents for our superiors.

And there’s everyone’s favourite task – Buying lunch.

Outside the company, we are all free human beings, with a life, with friends and family. As a matter of fact, other then our job titles, we are no difference from the so-called superiors. Whatever they can do, we can do so, in time or otherwise.

But inside the company, we are subjected to humiliation, neglect and condescendence. And we are judged by the label: INTERNS.

But we refuse to be discouraged by the odds, we fight against it. All of our lives we have fought this war. Tonight I believe we can end it. Tonight is not an accident. There are no accidents. We have not come here by chance.

I do not believe in chance. I do not see coincidence, I see providence, I see purpose. I believe it is our fate to be here. It is our destiny. I believe this night holds for each and every one of us the very meaning of our lives.

And as we walk, we must make the pledge that we shall always march ahead. We cannot turn back. There are those who are asking the devotees of Intern rights, “When will you be satisfied?”

We can never be satisfied as long as the Interns are the victims of the unspeakable horrors of
office politics.

We can never be satisfied as long as our bodies, heavy with the fatigue of kena arrow do all the random saikang in the office

We can never be satisfied as long as we are stripped of our selfhood and robbed of our dignity by being the lowest lifeform in the company”

I have a dream.

That one day, people will walk into the pantry and not see a creative director and intern sitting there eating their breakfast, but two equal employees of the company having their meal at the same table.

That one day, when an intern asks a question, the so-called superiors will answer the question gladly with a smile on their faces instead of brushing the question off.

That one day, when my children do their internship, they will work in a company where they will not be judged by their job title but by the content of their character.

I have a dream,

And one day, we will raise about the people who treated us like dogshit and spit in their faces while we treat our own interns with respect an employee deserves, with proper transport and health benefits. With proper OT money.

And if Singapore is to be a great nation, this must become true. And so let freedom ring from the prodigious hilltops of Bukit Timah.

Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of Mount Faber.

Let freedom ring from the snow-capped Rockies of WADEVA.

Let freedom ring from the curvaceous slopes of BBDC.

But not only that; let freedom ring from YELLOW SUBMARINE OF NGEE ANN POLY.

Let freedom ring from Ziggy Soh’s Jeep.

Let freedom ring from every hill and molehill of Pasir Panjang – from every mountainside.

Let freedom ring. And when this happens, and when we allow freedom ring – when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God’s children – Interns, Creative Directors, Account Directors, CEOs, Accountants, Receptionists, FA artists and more – will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Intern spiritual: “Free at last! Free at last! Thank God Almighty, we are free at last!”

*Note. Above story is fictitious and does not represent the situation this intern is currently in at the moment.